2.05.2013

First Day in 6 Months..

Its been a long while since I've worked.. 
..A long time since I drove the road most traveled about 6 months ago. 
..A long time since I've worn my business-casual attire and slipped my feet into a pair of suh-weet looking heels.. 
..And an even longer time since I've sat at my desk. 

After yesterday, I totally realized how much I actually missed all these things. 


I am happy to say that this Momma made it through her first day back.  I can't say I did it without a few welling tears, but it was a fabulous first day to work in six months.  I felt really great- pretty and confident in a new outfit I picked out special for my first day back. For Christmas Jordan surprised me with several items of clothing to add to my wardrobe- he said it was a 'reward' for months of bed rest and growing babies:)  Everything was from Loft, he knows me so well.  Perfect man, right?  I know.

On Sunday night I felt like I was getting ready for my first day of school or something!  Making my lunch and laying my clothes out.. sifting through the small box of stuff I brought home with me on my last day of work back in August, making sure I had everything I needed.  And of course, I was certain not to forget new pictures of my babies for the frames on my desk! 

I loved seeing everyone, and honestly I felt as if I had never even left.  A good feeling to walk into.

I say all this, but really- I missed my baby girls terribly.  TERRIBLY.  I don't know that I was prepared for the heart-wrenching lump in my throat that occured after I got the first text message from Jordan giving me an update on the girls, and it was a not-so-happy one. 

During their first feeding of the morning, Jolie had a rough time taking the bottle.  Jordan described it as "Bloody murder scream and cry.  Tears running."  What?  I've never seen tears roll down either of my sweet girls' faces, let alone a cry hard enough that warrants them.  My girls don't cry like this.  How can that be?  I just wanted to pack up my things and head home, never leaving their side again.  Ever.  My poor girl doesn't have much experience with the bottle at all, and so to have to take one was new to her. Thankfully the next update from the hubby was much better, and he included pictures and videos.  Really healped me get through my day without the three of them.  By bottle number three of the day, both girls had it down pretty well and ate to their little hearts desire. 

When my day's end rolled around I was actually surprised it was already time to head home.  Even though it was a good one, I was SO happy to be gettin' my hands on those sweet girls in just the time it takes to drive home!  Can I mention that my drive home was like the sky parted and God reached his loving hand down to remove all obsticals preventing me from getting home in no time?  He is so good. 


Man, I missed them so!  Everyone told me that leaving the baby(ies) was the hardest thing they ever had to do- and I can confidently say, they weren't lying to me.  It went better than expected- but still pretty rough not getting to see their smiles and hear their coos in person.  I've been the one sharing videos and pictures of these things all this time, not someone else!  But, I'm a strong momma and can totally handle this 'back-to-work' thing, no problem.     

Now, here I am on Day 2. 

Bring it.    

Photobucket

9 comments:

Megan. OneFifteenDanville. said...

You did it! You deserve a big hug! Some days will be harder than others I'm sure. I bet your girls are so happy to see you when you get home! :)

Kari Willis said...

Amber, it is the hardest thing ever. And I don't want to sugar coat it...it stays hard!! The good thing is that it gives others a chance to have their one on one time with the girls, which benefits everyone! It also allows you to be more thankful for the time you are with them!!

Good luck!!

Ali G said...

Thinking about you! My son is 16 months old & I don't believe its gotten any easier, it is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. All you can do is focus on the positive. I am absolutely thankful that my Aunt watches my sweet boy. I don't know what I would do without her. I believe you said you had family watching them as well. Thats such a comfort. Just know that it is okay to cry & have tough days just try to focus on the positive as best you can. Hang in there Momma:)

Mindy Rives said...

You go girl!!!! Are you working full time? So proud of you.

Taylor Wintle said...

You are a strong Momma! I am going back to school next week and leaving my sweet girl after 7 months of never leaving her side... This made me feel alot more confident that everything will be okay. Your babies are beautiful!!!

Kara said...

The best feeling driving home is knowing you are about to see your baby (or babies in your case). It's hard, but it does get easier.

Sarah Tucker said...

You look precious :)

The Joiners said...

Congrats on surviving day 1! Hopefully it will get easier from here :)

Sippy Cups and Pearls said...

I am SO stoked I found your blog - absolutely loving it! Wow, twins?! My good friend had twins a couple years ago - now they have 4 kids age 4 and under! ahhh! haha. LOVE IT! Aren't they little blessings?! I have to say, I made it back to work 2 weeks before I turned in my notice to stay home - I remember those tears you were talking about very well! But you can do it!! Good luck! TOTALLY adding you to my daily reads :)

Pin It button on image hover