mama confessions | because I'm not the only one..

1.) washing my hair is the biggest chore on the planet. 1-2 days a week MAX. even while working out 5 days a week.. I just shower with a towel wrapped around my head and then blow dry that sweat right out:)

2.) it occasionally takes two trips through the Starbuck's line to make it through errands with three kids all by myself.  Parker calls me out every.single.time.

3.) I do not succeed in the laundry department.  I actually fail miserably.  

4.) we eat cereal for dinner at least once a week.

5.) my favorite tv shows are teen mom 2 and keeping up with the kardashians.. and watching #hashtags on youtube.

6.) I've been caught a handful of times by a toddler than knows her story books by heart skipping pages.

7.) q-tips completely gross me out.  I can handle poop.  I can handle snot.  I can even handle puke (sometimes) but when it comes to ear wax I literally cannot tolerate it. 

8.) going to the grocery store often times means that we open a bag of pretzels or package of goldfish while we shop.  by the time we get to the register I hand the checkout person an empty bag to ring up. 

hey.  whatever works.

9.) the big girls know the word 'spicy' because I tell them things are spicy even when they're not so I can eat an entire meal without sharing.

10.) it takes me a longgggg time to pee when I have the hubby to man the children.

11.) when Jordan is home in the mornings the twins (most of the time its Parker) always wake their dad up.  they know for a fact their mother wont budge if its before 8am.

12.) if its just the girls at home, 9 times out of 10 I wake to my entire king size bed filled with puzzles, books, and Barbies.  because they know for a fact their mother wont budge before 8am.  

13.) I am absolutely TERRIBLE at remembering to brush Parker and Jolie's teeth.  I've started to set a reminder alarm in my phone so I don't forget!

14.) we have a room in the house that is stacked with party stuff, holiday decor, clothes, toys..  just a random slew of things that don't have a place.  that door stays shut. 

out of sight out of mind.

15.) when Baker stopped nursing last month I was really sad, I absolutely dreaded buying formula, and feared nearly to tears over giving her that first formula bottle.  BUT in those same moments felt a hint of relief and freedom.  with two other babies running around and taking advantage of the time their mother is out of service- I never realized how difficult it could be! scheduling my work day around pumping was one of the most stressful things of my life.

16.) Jolie and Parker talk about poop all day long.  for whatever reason I was convinced that GIRLS wouldn't talk like this.  but if the toddler humor shoe fits..

17.)  Parker tells me my breath stinks every morning.  like clock work.

18.) I used Amazon Prime NOW for the first time last week.  I bought three boxes of super tampons and a handful of organic baby food pouches.  you never can be too prepared!

19.) the extra five minutes it takes me to wash my face and brush my teeth before bed is almost as bad as washing my hair.  

why is it so annoying?! 

I'll tell you why.  I want to go to sleep right.now.

20.) Jordan: finish dinner so we can go take a shower, Jolie.

Jolie: I really have to go potty!!

Jordan: you can go potty when you get in the shower- take that last bite.

Jolie: DAD!  we cannot go poop in the shower!!

poop.  #allday

gold bow / dress / bubble romper 

motherhood is FULL of manic moments, you know?!